Wednesday, September 3, 2014

Done.

I am no longer a student. 

For the last nineteen years of my life, I have been identified as a student. I have attended class, done homework and written papers. The last few months I have identified myself as both a working professional and a student-even though I haven't attended classes. As of Sunday at 11pm, I was no longer a student. I sent off my dissertation.  As I sit here, with my glass of wine watching The Office after work, I feel odd. 

One massive chapter of my life is over.  

On to the next, but as I sit here cackling at Steve Carrell and Rainn Wilson (yes Mindy Kaling and BJ Novak are a close third and fourth) I am curious as to what this next chapter is going to look like. I am slightly terrified that I am going to become a hermit and I'm also terrified that as I make more adult purchases--like my amazing navy dining room chairs-- that I will loose touch with well being young. Semi stupid yet still a fear.  

I have begun to make a life I am proud of living one that keeps me active, keeps me grounded, keeps me busy, and one that I love to live. Is all this possible? 

There are these crazy breeds of women called, Superwomen. The ones that do it all, and make every other person wonder "How does she do it?"  (See Gwyneth Paltrow, Sarah Jessica Parker, and Sandra Bullock--Honorable Mentions on this list are Catherine Middleton, Megan Fox, and of course the infamous Kim Kardashian West) I want to be real enough to not have it together all the time.  I want to love the life I build, despite the times when it feels like I am 100% alone and everything is caving in.  Those times are few and far between, but I don't want to be afraid of them anymore.  I want to embrace the ups and downs. I want to enjoy the roller coaster. I don't want to do it all.  

 I don't want to be Superwoman. 

So here's to the journey to not be Superwoman. Here's to the journey to be me, Sara Kenzie Powell-- no longer a student, slightly dysfunctional, a little crazy, but in love with life.  

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